Friday, August 14, 2009

The Reading of Ulysses Continues.

What's Wrong with You?
If you have been reading this blog regularly and very recently, you should damn well know that I have been reading Ulysses by James Joyce, and have been inspired to spoof the novel in this blog.  That is why I am writing in Newspaper Headlines.
Some of My Best Friends are Popes.
The King of Wuxi Expatdom is seeking to dampen the controversy of saying the Pope was a nice guy by his saying " I really respect the Pope and I should add that some of my best friends are Pope".  Experts have said that the King's remarks will probably only throw oil of the fire caused by his remarks made in his site  "There is only one Pope so it was daft on his majesty's part to say that he knew and had befriended a lot of them" said one Holy See expert.
Wall Street Journal says World's Best Peaches are to be Found near Wuxi, China.
Visit the link here.
Some of My Best Friends are Gynecologists.
For some unknown reason, to this blogger anyway, the King of Wuxi also thought it was important to say "I respect Gynecologists.  I have vacationed with them.  Some of my best friends are Gynecologists."
Remarks about King Henry VIII were "Miscalibrated".
The King of Wuxi, at the same press conference where he talked about Gynecologists and Popes also said:  "Let me be perfectly clear about this.  I have no intention of beheading any women, whether I am married to them or not.  I realize now that my comments about a King wanting a divorce have evidently, inadvertently caused controversy.  I miscalibrated in my remarks, but I feel I have no need to apologize to anyone."
Pizza for Lunch
Wuxiandis had pizza for lunch.  It was leftover from Friday evening's trip to Pizza Hut (the new one on Zhongshan Road near TGIF).  "There is nothing better than taking two slices of supreme pizza and sandwiching them between three slices of the cheese lover's pizza with pan crust.  It makes for cheesy-goodness after being heated in the micro for three minutes"  said wuxiandis.
Stand on Bus means no Iliad
I couldn't read the Iliad because the bus was too crowded and so I couldn't get a seat.  My plan to write a Ulysses like novel basing everyday occurrences on the great poem The Iliad by Homer will have to wait.
The King of Wuxi offers to hold "Beer Summit" with Pope
In a press release, the King of Wuxi has invited Pope Benedict XVI to his Hui Shan mansion for a "Beer Summit".  "We can talk mano a mano about my religious views.  We can drink some Tai Hu Shui Beer and eat some peaches.  We can then arm-wrestle or have a belching-contest - his choice.  And then we can watch the original Wolf Man together on" said the King of Wuxi.
Holes in Socks
The blogger known as wuxiandis has holes in his socks.  Not knowing how to darn them, wuxiandis has resorted to wearing two pairs of socks at a time.  "I have this pair of shoes that is a little big, anyway.  Waste not, want not.  As I always say". said wuxiandis.
No Big Plans for Evening.
Wuxiandis, creator of the Andis Kaulins in China blog and the Wuxi Tony Update series, has no big plans for Saturday night.  "I am planning to spend quality time with my son Tony.  I may even make a WTU episode tonight.  Everything is ready for the eight days of TYOT which will begin on Sunday, August 16.

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