One of the girls who works at our school got married yesterday. It was only by happenstance that I learned of this. I went to the lunchroom to eat my lunch and heard the word baijoe mentioned. I made a comment about it to a girl named Ida who told me she drank only a little yesterday at a party. I asked what party? and she told me Nancy's wedding party. Knowing several Nancy's, I had to ask which one. I then had to confirm that it was the one I thought Ida said because I couldn't believe it. Anyway, at this party, most of the Chinese staff had been invited. One foreigner went. My reaction was surprise mixed with a feeling of "why wasn't I told!". Talking to the other foreigners, I learned that I was the last to know. Several of the other foreigners also happened to learn by happenstance I found out.
I shouldn't complain about this sort of thing happening in China because it has happened several times before. But still, you feel like a person apart when they do. Laowei are the last to know.
It reminds me of the time that my niece was born prematurely. I learned of it a week afterwards again by happenstance. Being told in a casual by-the-way manner, when I phoned my sister, by the father of the birth, I found it hard to say congratulations. I felt very insulted like I had been dealt a rebuke. It may well be that they were busy and things slipped their mind. Still, the sourness of the memory lingers with me. What happened brought that memory back.