Misanthrophy.

Am I an misanthrope? I sometimes like to think I am. But reading Florence King, the author of the best book on Misanthropy, to truly be an misanthrope one has to have high standards. Also, true misanthropes are born. I was born shy. So I found myself, in my teenage years, thinking myself as a loner. I even looked in literature and movies for loners to admire. Discovering Florence King's writings, it seemed cooler to describe myself as misanthropic. But that is the problem - it seems cool. Coolness is ultimately phony. Coolness is about forgoing conscience that I mentioned in the previous blog entry. But I am making a mental connection that I find impossible to explain.

Anyway, like my e-mailer, whom I have been writing to about this topic recently, I am reluctant to be misanthropic all the time. I wish I could find some people who I can really appreciate. But it is hard. Still, I have to myself put in others' shoes and ask if there is anything about me that can be appreciated.

So, much as misanthropy appeals to me, I have to label myself a wannabe.