Saturday, December 14, 2024

4:49 PM View


 There is some kind of building project going on in front of the right hand side buildings.

I was hoping to go to the Red Lion tonight.  Tony initially promised to go but changed his mind.  I asked three others but they were busy.  So, I’ll be spending the evening and night at the Wuxi Ivy Park apartment.  It is probably just as well that I don’t go because I can’t naturally enjoy or not enjoy these outings.  I have to fight existential despair — what a pretentious way of putting it — and not be able to find a way to just have a good time.  No matter how much experience should prepare me for nothing-will-happen, I find myself full of resentment.  (resentment at what?)

I prayed the rosary this afternoon.  Doing this prayer as often as I do, I believe the devil is real.  I often find, when my mind wanders, these dark thoughts coming into my mind where either I imagine my resentments acted out or some evil act depicted in a movie,

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