Stupid Me. Un-PC Tony

One morning, I went to find the shoes that I had worn the night before on my way home.  I was startled to see that there was one blue Kalenji brand sneaker (right foot) and one black Kalenji brand sneaker (left foot) by the apartment door.  My hopes of finding the other blue and black shoes of the pairs were quickly dashed.

What were my hopes?  Why was I hoping?  I had hoped that I hadn't worn this mis-matched pair of shoes on my way home from work.  I had been hoping that this Laowei hadn't been a ridiculous looking sight as I sat on the crowded subway.  

How is it that I was wearing mis-matched shoes?  At work, I wear dress shoes when I teach my classes.  At the end of my shift, I take the dress shoes off and change into my sneakers.  I leave the dress shoes at work because I don't want to expose them to the wear and tear of my long commute home which includes a twenty minute walk.  I also have a pair of blue sneakers that i keep at work and wear during my children's classes.  So the night before, I had hurriedly changed shoes and not paid attention to their colours.  And I didn't notice the mismatch on the entire forty minute commute back home. *

A funny thing really.

The next morning, reading the Book of Disquiet by Fernando Pessoa I came upon a passage where he wrote about great mathematicians making mistakes doing small sums.  Good to now that smart people can do stupid things too, I thought.  Nice to come upon this passage after my evening of humiliation, I further pondered.

*I didn't feel the sneakers were different because they were the same model of shoe but different colour.  There is only one model of shoe that I can get in Wuxi in my size (47).

* * * *

I downloaded the film Expendables 2 for Tony to watch on my computer.  He had read that Chuck Norris was in the film and so he wanted to see it.

He didn't know that the film had many other action film stars in it like Sylvester Stallone, Bruce Willis and Arnold Schwarzenegger.

When he saw Schwarzenegger, Tony asked me who it was.

"That's Arnold Schwarzenegger." I said.

"Arnold Schwarzen*gger?" he responded. (the "*" replaces and "i")

"Jesus no, Tony! Schwarzenegger!  SCHWARZENEGGER!!"

Tony then put on a mishcievious smile and said "Schwarzen*gger!"

Oh well.  Kids will be kids.

Tony learned the n* word from watching Blazing Saddles.