AKIC Does the Proust Questionaire

A writer I regularly follow was asked to complete the Prouse questionaire, a parlor game having some connection with Marcel Proust. Answering the questionaire, it is said, reveals one's true nature. The writer I followed was up to doing the questionaire, and so am I am, whether or not anyone demands it.

What is your idea of perfect happiness?

To be in a state of no worries, where there is no place I have to go, of not being slave to the clock, where my wife and son are content, and my faith in God is strong.

What is your greatest fear?

Harm coming to my wife and son.

Which historical figure do you most identify with?

Lawrence of Arabia. If the aphorist Nicolás Gómez Dávila could be classified as an historical figure, he would be my answer to this question instead.

Which living person do you most admire?

David Warren, blogger at Essays in Idleness.

What is the trait you most deplore in yourself?

Inability to control my temper and inability to assert myself.

What is the trait you most deplore in others?

Tardiness.

What is your greatest extravagance?

Currently, it is a trip to an expensive Wuxi Expat pub.

What is your favorite journey?

This question throws me. I take it in two ways and so I will provide two anwers. Firstly, the best journey of my life for me was to go to Dealey Plaza in Dallas, Texas. I was a JFK assassination buff and to be in a place I had so much imagined was wonderful. Secondly, as for a journey I would do all the time, I would have to say a walk through the back streets of Wuxi.

What do you consider the most overrated virtue?

I find this a hard question to answer. Looking at a list of them, I choose temperance. I think it is okay to act out a wide range of emotions. In other words, I don't like people who act cool.

On what occasion do you lie?

That is another tough question for me. I do withhold information which is not the same as deliberately telling an untruth. But it would be a lie to never say I lie. So, I would have to say I lie to my wife and my son when to not do so would cause me inconvience.

What do you dislike the most about your appearance?

My thinness.

Which living person do you most despise?

Leonardo Decaprio.

Which words or phrases do you most overuse?

"I guess" and many words ending in "ing." 

What is your greatest regret?

Not having made the effort to become a parliamentary page after graduating from high school.

What or who is the greatest love of your life?

My wife.

When and where were you happiest?

When I was able to present my father with a grandson.

Which talent would you most like to have?

To be multilingual.

What is your current state of mind?

I am feeling ineffectual and useless.

If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

I would stop thinking about being Catholic and become one.

If you could change one thing about your family, what would it be?

I would like there to be more children.

What do you consider your greatest achievement?

Coming to China and meeting my wife.

If you were to die and come back as a person or thing, what do you think it would be?

A man of leisure who reads a lot, writes a lot, and becomes famous after death.

What is your most treasured possession?

My father's wedding ring. My mother gave it to me when he died.

What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?

To feel you are irredeemablyguilty.

Where would you like to live?

In the mountains.

What is your favorite occupation?

Taking care of my son.

What is your most marked characteristic?

My aloofness.

What is the quality you most like in a man?

Friendliness.

What is the quality you most like in a woman?

Gentleness.

What do you most value in your friends?

Open-mindedness.

Who are your favorite writers?

Geroge Orwell, Evelyn Waugh, Elmore Leonard, William Shakespeare, Flannery O'Connor, David Warren, Anthony Ensolen, Peter Hitchens, GK Chesterton, Nicholas Gomez Davillia, TS Eliot, PD Wodehouse, Malcom Muggeridge, WB Yeats, Michael Crichton, John Derbyshire, VS Naipal, Theodore Dalrymple, Michel Houellebecq, Joseph Ratzinger, Anne Coulter, Florence King, Michael Connelly, Simon Leys, Coventry Patmore, Conrad Black, Stephen Leacock and Mordecai Richler. To name a few!!

Who is your favorite hero of fiction?

My heroes of fiction are Bertram Wooster and his butler Jeeves. They represent the two halves of my personality that are always in contention. Wooster represents my frivilous side; Jeeves, my serious side.

Who are your heroes in real life?

Reactionaries, Traditional Catholics and Dissidents.

What are your favorite names?

Anthony, Clint

What is it that you most dislike?

Chinese drivers, Chinese teenagers glued to their smartphones, and Chinese children screaming "foreigner!" when they encounter me. I also hate people labelling themselves as middle-of-the-road.

How would you like to die?

In my sleep.

What is your favorite motto?

Don't believe the bullshit.

Comments? Questions? Email me at andiskaulins@protonmail.com.